Post Grad, Purpose, and Personal Identity

Graduating college is one of the busiest, most rewarding, celebratory experiences I've ever been through. You and your closest friends over the

past four years all get to feel your hard work come to fruition with the turning of the tassels, and then you get to eat good food, go have fun, and celebrate the finale of another chapter of your life!

And then comes post-grad. And nobody talks about it.

I loved graduating college and I loved getting to celebrate, but I also had never felt more overwhelmed or lost as I did starting that day. We go our whole lives only knowing one structure, which is school. For the past 18 years, I had gone to classes, done my homework, gotten involved in extracurriculars on campus, and now here I am. Graduated. No set path, no set passion, no set "purpose."

We are told that after college, you are meant to get a job that fulfills you and your passions, but also pays well and is also in your dream location that allows you to maintain friendships and make a bunch of new ones. You are meant to grow up, to "come of age," and to live the rest of your life fulfilling this set career, set life path, and set journey.

All these decisions at the ripe age of 21? 22 if you're lucky?

At my college, I find that there are two set "paths" that are rewarded: the first being the ones who already have a set and secure job before they even graduate college. Typically, it's either a business and finance or tech-related job. It pays well, their plan is safe and secure and stable, and they don't have to worry about the future.

The other path, while slightly less "stable," is pursuing your passion. You know exactly what your dream is, what your purpose is, and what you are meant to spend the rest of your life doing. And you spend every waking second contributing to this purpose, this passion.

Both of these are rightfully admirable; to be stable in a job that will allow you to live a fulfilling life outside of work, and to pursue a job that fulfills you. The dream life, of course, is to have the best of both worlds: your passion and dream ALSO gives you stability. Then you've cracked the code on "life" and you will be set forever...right?

There is no hate to either of these types of people. In fact, more often than not, there is simply envy, felt by me and everyone else that observes them. But what if you don't feel like you fit into either of those categories?

On the surface, I look like I may fit into both. I studied Nutrition for four years, and took the next "logical" step. I applied to year-long dietetic internships, matched with my top choice, and am on the way to becoming a Registered Dietitian. I had a plan before I even graduated college. From there, I can get a professional job, one that is stable and secure and also related to what I studied and therefore must be passionate about. But if that was the case, why was I feeling so lost on Graduation Day?

As a society, we have put so much pressure on ourselves to know exactly what our purpose is, who we are, and why we were put on this Earth. And we are supposed to have all of this figured out the SECOND we graduate college, if not sooner.

We've only been on this Earth for 20 years. We have so much more life left to live, and we are still growing up. Most people's brains aren't even fully mature until age 25. And yet, we feel like we have to know everything.

I am the first to admit that I feel like I have never known less than I do now, about who I am, what my "purpose" is, what I want my future career to be...the list goes on. And it can be so incredibly frustrating when so many of my peers appear to not have these issues at all. So many seem like they either have their stability or have their life's purpose...how did they all figure it out?

Lately, I've been trying to brainstorm how to ease this anxiety and overwhelming confusion.

I've been reflecting: what do I like? What do I not like? What am I passionate about? For lack of less dramatic terms: who am I?

It can be easy to get caught up in the unknowns, or everything you "aren't." By focusing on the parts of myself that are already a part of my identity, I can dig deep as to what I really like and what else I want to become.

For me, I do like nutrition and I do like the other "traits" I possess.

I find nutrition interesting, and I genuinely enjoy certain realms of the field.

I like that I emphasize self-care, mental health, and a diet-free lifestyle related to health and wellness.

I also like that that is not all of me. I'm also into content creating, baking, cooking unique recipes, playing ukulele, watching silly movies and TV shows, exploring the nearest big city and everything it has to offer, and listening to music.

Then there's the more general "likes:" I like both black coffee and fun lattes. I like sunshine at the beach and cloudy days curled up under cozy blankets. I like that I care deeply about other people's feelings and that I consider my friends a part of my family. I like that I have that desire to make a change in the world and to be a part of something bigger than myself.

Are any of these career starting factors or hobbies? Really..who's to say? If there's one thing I've learned from my elders, it's that life has no timeline, and there are no real rules.

Now, what do I want to become? What other passions do I want to pursue?

Deeply and honestly, I do not know. But instead of feeling like I have to know and that the rest of my life is practically over, what if I remembered I am only 21. I have so much time to explore other passions, to find my purpose. Or better yet, what if my purpose is just to live? To make people's days a little bit brighter? To throw incredible dinner parties and always make people feel like they have a safe space within me?

I'm going to use this platform to discuss fun potential "passions" or pieces of life that I pursue. Whether that be learning to play the drums, finding the best crispy brussel sprout to ever exist, pursuing mixology or makeup art or performing arts, I have to think why...not.

I'm also hoping my own journey of "finding myself" will serve as inspiration to others. Maybe it will remind everyone you don't have to have the "perfect on paper"

job. You don't have to know what will light your fire for the rest of your life. You don't even have to have a dream job...your dream can just be going on that "self-discovery" journey.

Whatever you feel as a post-grad person is completely normal. You are not alone in this place of life. Just do your best to live it;).