Slowing Down

Lately, I've been feeling down. We've been in quarantine for nearly three months now, and it's hard not to feel like life is flying by whilst I'm stuck waiting to be allowed to live it again.

I, like most other people these days, am used to having a packed schedule. Before miss 'Rona decided to pop by, I was tackling a full on college schedule, topped with working a job, participating in clubs, serving a position within my sorority, and making time to hang with friends when I could. On top of that, I had to try to eat to fuel my body, exercise, shower, remember to do my skincare, and get a full night's sleep.

It sounds like a lot to some, it doesn't even compare to others. Regardless, I told people I loved life when I was busiest. And to an extent, that's true. I feel accomplished when I can look back at life and say "wow...I did that." Truth be told, this particular semester, I was feeling overwhelmed. But often times, when our life is thrown completely off course, our brightest moments are all that we remember. The memory that quarantine has worked so hard to fog is the breakdowns, the calling my parents saying I felt burnt out. In fact, before quarantine started, I distinctly remember saying "I need a break."

Now that that break has been three months, it's hard to not feel stuck in a rut. I feel guilty for not being in school, for my internship getting cancelled, for no places currently hiring for work, for gyms not being open. I'm left to perform simple, mundane activities, waiting for the moment life can finally start again.

But then I thought...is this really so bad?

Sure, I miss my friends, and in a LOT of ways, I really miss my past lifestyle. But quarantine has ALSO given me the opportunity to take that break I was so desperately craving. If anything, I've started to learn that there's an art to this slowed down lifestyle.

There is societal pressure to consistently overwork yourself. Overachieving has become the new mediocre. But what about those who live this slower lifestyle? What if they're living a secret luxury that we haven't dared to endure?

In reality, quarantine has given me that chance to slow down. To discover myself, discover new hobbies and accomplish new goals I wouldn't have otherwise made the time for.

I've gotten into running, a form of physical activity I told myself for years I was incapable of doing.

I've created a new blog...one that I am actually proud of.

I found the PERFECT chocolate chip cookie recipe.

I've read books that have been on my reading list for years.

I've discovered what influencers I REALLY respect and why.

I've explored new areas just outside of my town and found a new comfort in nature.

I've gotten REALLY into paint by numbers.

Sure, these are all little victories, but victories I NEVER would have accomplished had quarantine not given me the break needed to do so.

Point is, YES, getting back to "real life" is exciting. I'm looking forward to having a greater purpose in life again. However, in many ways I'll also permit myself to slow down. It's okay to take on less, and to put MORE energy into fewer things. Making time for yourself is just as important as making time for everything else.

How have you been slowing down throughout this experience?? Let me know in the comments!